PUT ON AND TAKE OFF
PUT ON AND TAKE OFF.ARIZONA
That movement that latelly i have been doing so often when i remove my clothes and put them again accepting this challenging winter, although isnt tecnically winter literally sucks!.
I do remember very well those nights that precede my goodbyes, i am sitting out there looking to the sky to condense, i am alone, but this solitude pass fast like a shadow, comes and goes, like those people that i leave behind, and i do it giving them a part of my heart, also those that from faraway leave too.
Those days i had so many goodbyes, so many put on and take off.
sudentlly it comes into my memory those days when i wanted to discover the world, far from the books, far from those inside walls of this estructured society, i wished big time to be out there, smell this smell from those that their adventure it´s nothing else to have the chance to suffer a bit less, far from those adveturers that just want to go higher and higher, with the best gear of course!!!, but then i have said goodbye too, i guess i was still to young to see , to understand,so i went back to the books, those that teach us how to be somebody they say!!, but those that doesnt teach us how to love, this is why i think that today ther´s so much grey happiness, pleasure it´s only based on the welfare of the weekends or vacations, all in this society where the best value is for this that we dont have, and not really for finding out who we really are.
Since then i have discovered myself, and i have learned about this irremediable pain of saying goodbye, and today´s it´s almost six years that i am exposed to it.
So many put on and take off, all those dreams that i never let them go eventhough if i know that the first step it will be so hard to climb.
I am here in the Navajo´s indians land, land of the majestic Grand Canyon, land of Jhon Wayne, this red land when the night falls stars turn up one by one, here where the solitude shares this inmensity with this deafening silence.
I´ve left Moab with the pain and the happiness mixed toguether, not long before i have said goodbye to the lovelly Carrie´s, then was the time for Cullen´s, and so on and on, during almost 2000 days that i am out there. I do not believe in angels or demons, but in my way i had an angel in Catalonia that today´s left too, those are those moments that put us much closer when we leave, that moment when mind and feelings dont want to walk toguether and the only thing we want to do it´s bang with unger this huge wall that nature rises betwen us, unfortunatly i had to say so many goodbyes and today i know very well that heart-rending times that precede it.
Put on and take off again, the cold north wind freeze my sweat acumulated after those hills that glued me on the asphalt, the daily light it´s to short to get anywhere, it´s already been many days that the cold night cought me, my muscles are tense and my memories got me till my defeat.
Some days ago i was pedaling during the sunset, my body didn´t like to go further, cold heurted me and finally i have stoped to shout of frustration next to the road, while some tears freeze on their way down to my cheeks, but my surprise was that from behind a bush a lady came out fasten her pants, we both swap a big smile.
On my way i thought, all those rides,travels, changing places even it´s so hard to say goodbye, also recreate the mood of living outside those high walls.
Maybe today´s thos e words come to you in a sad way, be sure they aren´t at all, i have to be happy no matter how many put on or off, becouse my life´s full of people that stare me at my eyes, people that fight next to me with out being called, people able ta say the thruth eventhough sometimes i dont want to hear it, they are people that dont live in the same world, maybe! but they put my hands close to their hearts, the same that i say goodbye when i really want them so close to me, but also they make my life much more simple, rich and beautiful.
It´s been some years that i have decided to be out there, this place of those adventurers dont need any ego, becouse they just know that their life belong to them.
So this is it my dears, put on and take off, this is my life today´s and this will be if i still feel that i am able to make differences towards those that suffer in this world that from inside those walls look so grey.
Never ever doubt even those sentences spit sadness my heart it´s happy, becouse i can say that my life it´s mesured by those breathtaking moments.
Put on and take off, It´s bloody cold out there…
THE MOST HUMILIATING SLAVERY IT´S THE ONES OF BEING SLAVES OF OURSELVES.
HEALTH AND GOOD JOURNEY, NANDO.