THE DROP ON MY NOSE
THE DROP IN MY NOSE.
Drop that it falls free and sometimes frozen up while i was passing trough the hig passes, that drop that today´s looks like belong to the past already, like those long and difficult days where the ridiculus speed average was no more than 6 miles per hour, also far looks this shame of those huge expensive houses in Vail or Aspen, those places where rich people´s seams to create this untouchable world, world that also see in a bad way those that we use another skin color, although the weird paradoxe is that this people´s with other skin color are the ones who clean their shit!!!.
While i was passing trough those clean streets i had the chance to talk to many people surprislly belive or not i just used the spanish language, why? well, out there in the cold i only found those mexican ilegal inmigrants or wet baks like they like to call them here, those that one day tried to cross this imaginary line that one day somebody decided that it must be impassable, there i´ve meet Alma a lovelly pretty girl with a sad smile, she had lost her 4 years old son while she crossed this inpassable line, she made it,her son today´s it´s just a memory.
Although this, i cant remove this drop from my nose, and i headed to Utah, this desert of red rock walls, those that can talk and play to change it colors, and that sometimes get till where the words never will, in Utah although it´s a desert place, the cold , the wind and the rain can still heurt, and with this i´ll keep traveling alone, and all somethimes seams to be in movement, the walls, the shadows look life they are awake, but in our solitude not all is smoth and easy, the previous days before getting here to Moab where very difficult for me, the wind, the rain and the cold, stoled me all my dreams, all was soaking weat, and i had the sensation that i couls swim into my tent, this cozy place where i have created so many dreams.
Every new day is a past memory, is one no going back again, the only that remains is the heavy weight of all those lived experiences that i carry proudlly on my bags, into them i have included Cullen´s, this guy with lost look and a heart full of gratitude with out asking anything back.
This is how i´ll be keep going forward with out stoping much, eventhough sometimes this solitude blind my eyes and i cant see forward, but i do can see and feel the pleasure of having a bed to sleep after all those long nights sleeping with the stars, and this make me realice the value of all of this that we dont have anymore, and that sometimes we dont know how to describe our own dark and suffocating inner life.
Days are shorter and shorter, mornings are colder and colder, and outside there all looks like grey and sad, but beyond this sadnness there´s always a wonder, like guys like Cullen´s ready to help, or those red landscapes on the bottom of the lov Salle´s mountains, all this nature that can change far from any of our comprehention, even in this desert when it rains we all realise that the most glorious moments are when the sun shines.
Utah this life natural museum, that red rock that looks like rusty, looking at it gives me the feeling to know that i may be able to make that many moments of my dreams will be able to remove the wrinkles of my heart, and at the same time bringing me to those inaccessible places…
And this is how i am sudden stop sudden move, is when i feel that i have almost everything but then i loose all so close to the end , there where everything starts again.
This drop in my nose, that i also carry on my bags, toghether with all those that i pass by and open the doors of their gartitude, people´s like, Joy´s, Cullen´s Emily´s, and of many others indeed, on those bags that i also carry all those moons, all those cold nights, and those wonderful smiles of those that love me or i love, those that today´s it looks like that i can only touch them on dreams, becouse i want them free, although in my own selfishnness i´d like to have them close to me on those nights with out moons, this free drop in my nose , that we cannot conquest or impose, just accept it with tenderness and loyalty.
soon i´ll be leaving Moab, soon i´ll be cleaning again my dirty clothes on those frezzing wathers, soon i´ll be leaving those fragile red arches that looks like that challenge all the gravity laws, and in silence i´ll keep triying to be this free man that will love to make little differences on the life of those in need, the man that doesn´t fear to go till the end of he´s thoughts.
I´ll keep taking life with lots of calm, i´ll try to survive in this crazy world, i will , becouse i have this little voice that wisper me that i have to let my self go till the end..
I´ll be leaving Moab, with my bags full of memories, full of smiles that make me live, i´ll leave Moab challenging the winter eventhough till know only gaved me this cold drop in my nose, and listening this little voice i´ll keep thinking that in the count of my life i am already miss lots of days.
Alma had lost her son,Cullen´s opened hes heart for me when i was shivering of cold, Carol´s she keeps beeing this little voice to me, and Joan´s Marc sended me a smile..
Traveling for what?, well for me life it´s a trip itself, mine it´s full of names, and those make me feel that the fact of just having the chance to breath it already worth it to challenge the unchallenging.
Today´s sun was so bright, the sky was as blue that it looked like it could bend beyond those lovelly red mountains.
THE DROP IN MY NOSE.
THE REAL FRIENDSHIP NEVER DEPENDS OF THINGS LIKE SPACE OR TIME…
HEALTH AND GOOD JOURNEY , NANDO.