CROSSING THE LINE
CROSSING THE LINE
Days go fast here in Knysna, the sensations become remembrances to quick. I went back to Doroty Broster orphanage, to visit the kids, as i wanted they put a big smile on my day, and at the same speed i found myself huging a daily conventional stile of life ” WORK “, scare word, I’ve been working on helping my friend in organizing sports events, and working brought me back the sensation that makes you feel slave of you,re own desitions, the same ones that one day i,ve decided not to take anymore, and at the same time having the strenght of crossing the line,this ones that we put in betwen us and the reality of our feelings.
To often we ask ourselfs, all those silly questions, like WHY this or that?WHY everything?, forgetting at the same time the matter to accept what,s really going on in our lifes or around us, Wars, Poverty, etc etc, but we all use to forget them if we think that we have sall we need, but we really know what we need??
Me personally i have to say, that i need to feel, to learn how to cross those line with out fear to loose, and at the same time i am nor sure that i am the right person to say what the others need.
But i would really like that my words breack the moulds, i would like that my words make you thinking deep, or just simply believe.
It,s been three years that i,ve left home, i did it happy but with a sensation of doubt, an horrible fear, to cross a line that i puted my self during all my life, in this particullar moment i needed a little push to help me, and there it was! the great sensation of freedom.
Not knowing abaut the next future gave me a feeling of nausea, but also i knew that i tooked the right desition.
Now all of this seams very far already, and i feel proudlly happy to talk abaut, to be where i am, to do what i am doing, i feel extremelly happy to just live like i feel, even if at the same time, and very often those days, i feel the yearning of those that i really love.
In all of this time, i cant count by now how many great experienced i,ve lived, and also i,ll lie if i say that i didn,t had any Bad ones, i had a loots too, but now for me the only real thing among of all those feelings is that i,ve dicovered the value of loving or being loved, and again i realise that my life today is all abaut feelings.
Have you ever tried to cross this imaginary line of doubts, with out really doubt at all?.
So this is how my life is now, how Gambada tickelish the ground floor, how Nando is, and i,ll like to apologise to you if this chronicle seams a bit sad, have to say that isn,t is just a bit of yearning that runs into me, but this is how i am feeling and in my life there is no place anymore for doubting when something real happens, even if i am living in the paradoxe of crossing one wonderful line and embrace something that i really wish, but in the other side the fear and the doubts draw others paths.
Thanks to all of you, to help me to be like i want to be, thak you to allowed me to make you think, i just would like that one day you could accept you,re real feelings. all with out fear of crossing this line that we often draw by mistake on the very very short distance of our lifes.
CROSSING THE LINE.
HEALTH AND GOOD JOURNEY, NANDO.
THOSE THAT THEY PREFERE GOOD SENSE AND GET AWAY FROM THE MADNESS, THEY NEVER GONNA BE ABLE TO FEEL THE REAL LOVE.